a painfull revenge
by frwan133gurl
Summary: when a warlock seeks revenge from the warren line he decides to take phoebe.Now the sisters have to deal with phoebe's healing process after he's vanquish.WARNING: talk about rape, drugs and stuff.CHAPTER 17 UP! read please!
1. the kidnap

The kidnap  
  
Phoebe walked trough the parking lot of the library. She hurried to make it home fast. Once again she has fallen asleep on the library and she knew her sisters would probably be worried since it was pretty late. .No demons had shown up in the last few weeks and now the girls were getting a chance to live a somewhat called "normal life" away from all the magical stuff. Piper was with Leo, Prue was with Jack and Phoebe was once again the fifth wheel. She hadn't found her prince charm yet. She walked over to Prue's car when she suddenly got pulled over from a dark alley near the parking lot. She struggled to fight the cold hands holding her tightly while all of her books fell to the floor. He pulled her from behind blindfolding her with one hand leading her to and old house in an abandoned building. She screamed trough the hands of her captor He opened the front door (more like he touched it and it fell . . .), and throw phoebe to the floor. Phoebe didn't stop moving and fighting against him 'till he got tired and started beating her for like seamed like an eternity for phoebe Halliwell. She fight back, using her martial arts moves. She tried to kick him but he was stronger than her, maybe too strong. His power didn't seem human at all, 'he must be a demon of some kind' Phoebe thought. He got tired of fighting and decided it was time to use his powers. He threw a light ball to her. She had hurt her knee and couldn't get up; before she could react the light ball hit her, throwing her against the wall. She was bleeding badly and the pain was almost unbearable. He looked at her with a satisfaction look on his face and laughed evilly. She just stared him with a cold look of pure hate.  
  
"Ok, enough of this crap" He yelled suddenly on the edge of his temper.  
  
"W . . . wha . . . what do you wa . . . want?" she managed to say between her constant complains for the pain in her knee.  
  
"What do I want? Well to kill the charmed ones of course "he said. "I don't only want to kill you, I want to you all suffer"  
  
"Why?" she asked scared. She was vulnerable and she knew it. He could make her suffer all he wanted right then and she knew she was not gonna be able to fight back due to her condition.  
  
"Because centuries ago your family killed my father and send him to hell forcing him to eternal pain" he said angry at the thought.  
  
"My sisters are going to find me before you get to do anything to me!" she said yelled weakly trying to scare him.  
  
"That's what YOU think but I made sure they won't find us. See, I cast a spell on this so called house so neither your sisters nor your withelighter can track you "he laughed.  
  
Phoebe just stared at him in horror.  
  
". . . and now we are going to have some fun" he said walking over to were she was. He started to ripped off her clothes and then raped her. She tried to fight back, she really did but he was laying on top of her making extra preesion on her ribs and stomach were he had kicked her earlier during their fight. She knew she has a broken rib and that she probably needed medical attention. He started touching her everywhere almost like an animal. His hands were cold against her body and every touch made her flich, but he liked it. He liked the fact that he was touching her against her will. He started taunting her with kisses in her neck wich made her want to puke. She tried to kick him but for a moment she forgot that her knee was injured. The minute she moved her knee she cried in pain. She then realize that it wasn't worth to fight. Whatever he was gonna do to her she wasn't gonna be able to fight it because of her condition. He was going to rape her whether she fight it or not and there was nothing she could do about it. Her thoughts focused on her sisters. Where were they now when she needed them the most ? 


	2. pain

---------------------- MANOR -----------------------------  
  
"Piper, here the hell is she?!" Prue asked trying to stay as calm as possible. "Prue I'm sure she'll be home anytime now" said piper not believing it herself. "I hope so" said Prue worried. "Come on, let's go back to bed" Piper said leading Prue to her room.  
  
-----------------ABANDONED HOUSE --------------------  
  
Phoebe lay on the floor sobbing non- stop. The only thing covering her bruised body was her bloody clothes. The men looked down at her laughing in satisfaction.  
  
"Look at you phoebe Halliwell, some witch" he said sarcastically.  
  
"You make me sick! "He yelled angry as he whipped her with his belt. He whipped her over and over again. The pain of the belt against her was nothing compared to what was going on her mind.  
  
"You are a big bitch you now that?" He said taunting her as he leaned close to her. She immediately tried to escape his touch. She stepped back trying to avoid him, his cold stare and his dirty hands but she was trapped against him and the wall.  
  
"How many guys have you slept with? Huh?! "He asked.  
  
Phoebe cried even harder than ever. She wasn't only scared and hurt physically, she was also deeply hurt for the things he was saying to her. For some reason every insult he said to her made her believe she actually was that.  
  
"Now, how many of those guys actually loved you? "He asked.  
  
"None of them did! "He yelled angry while pulling phoebe's hair causing her to look up to her. He then pulled her face to him and kissed her making phoebe want to vomit.  
  
"Well, why would they love you anyway? "He said coldly.  
  
"I mean seriously, look at you. You're not smart, or funny. For god's sakes you're not even pretty! "He said walking around in circles around phoebe. His yelling scared her. The sound of his voice made her think of his mouth running trough her body while she tried to escape.  
  
"I'm not surprise you're sisters don't love you either".  
  
Phoebe immediately looked up to him in anger at the mention of her sister's names.  
  
"My sisters do love me don't you dare say they don't!" she said finding a hiding strength. The thought of her sisters was the only thing giving her hope in that place.  
  
"Riiiiiiiiight.I'm sure" he said laughing.  
  
"Let's see how much they love you" said the warlock.  
  
He lifted up is hand and as with light came out of it and entered from her eyes to her mind. Suddenly all the fights she's ever had whit her sisters came back to her. She saw all the yelling, the tears, and the pain they've caused to each other over the years. Phoebe fell into a whole new set of tears. After all this years her sisters has tried to convince phoebe they did love her seamed like a big joke now.  
  
"See phoebe. I'm only saying what I see, which is the same your sisters see" he said seriously as he played with phoebe's mind. He knew that under the circumstances she was in she would probably believe everything he said to her. 


	3. worry and blame of the sisters

Worry and concerned of the sisters  
  
Prue passed back and forth in front of Piper who was trying to calm Prue down, but she was having problems staying calm herself.  
  
"What do you mean she hasn't come home yet?!" Yelled Prue worried as hell.  
  
"That's what I mean; she didn't come home last night" said Piper trying to be as calm as possible but Prue was making it pretty difficult.  
  
"Well where is she then?!" yelled Prue at the top of her temperament  
  
"I don't know that's why I told Leo to ask the elders!" said piper irritated by pure. "I know.I' m sorry" said Prue calming down  
  
"No don't be sorry we both are concerned for phoebe" said piper taking a deep breath.  
  
"No I have to and I want to. I'm just so stressed for this hole phoebe thing that I got carried away and took it out on you..I just can't help but to think that maybe if I would of done something.phoebe would be here.. "Prue said with teary eyes.  
  
"Prue you can't blame yourself for everything that happens with us" said piper putting an arm around Prue's shoulders." We are not little girls anymore. if something happened to phoebe it was because she was in the wrong place at the wrong time but it has nothing to do with you. it's not your fault, or mine for that matter so stop it. Look, I'm trying to be strong for both of us right now but I can't ok, I need you to be strong for me" said piper almost crying at the thought of loosing phoebe.  
  
Prue took piper in her arms and hugged her like she did when they were little kids and piper just had a nightmare, only this time it was for real. Phoebe was missing. After a few minutes of holding each other Leo orbed in. Only he did not look like himself, at the contrary, he looked worry and slightly discolored.. 


	4. pain of the sister and a way out of it

Pain..of the sisters and, hopefully, a way out  
  
"Ohw no, Leo please tell me they know where she is.?" Said piper hopefully but she already knew by Leo's face that he had bad news. Prue squeezed piper's hand giving her all the support she could but the truth is that she was terrified.  
  
"Guys." Leo started. He tried to think of the best approach to tell them the bad news." I'm sorry but.they can't sense her anywhere in their radar"Leo explained.  
  
"What does THAT mean?" Prue said panicking.  
  
"Well, they think a warlock may have taken her "he said seriously. "Ikarias" he finished.  
  
"Oh my god." muttered Piper taking a sit on the couch. Prue sat down next to her and rested her head on her hands.  
  
"Wha.what are we gonna do?" asked piper scared. She could already feel the hot tears in her eyes.  
  
"Well, right now nothing. All you can do is have faith.maybe even communicate with her somehow." suggested Leo. He hated to see the sisters so vulnerable.  
  
"What do you mean communicate with her?" asked Prue confused.  
  
"The elders think that thanks to you're the sisterly bond you guys have created over the years you may be able to sense wherever she is and hopefully communicate with her" Leo said  
  
"How do we do that?" asked Piper.  
  
"You just sit here and think o phoebe. Try to think of your love or her, all the good times you guys have shared "said Leo.  
  
"Well that should be too hard" added Prue  
  
Leo looked up to the ceiling hearing that the elders were calling him.  
  
"I'm sorry guys I gotta go" said Leo. He went over to piper and hugged her. After kissing her goodbye he got close to her ear and whispered something. "Be strong Pipe, we are gonna get her back" he whispered and with that he took off.  
  
Piper turned away from Prue. Exhausted and sad Piper felt like her world was falling apart. "Piper, honey?" said pretty in a sweet vice. Piper kept quietly. Suddenly she started crying letting the tears she had been holding for so long make their way down on her face. "Pipe, are you.crying?" asked Prue concerned. Just then Piper turned to Prue and literally fell on her sobbing non-stop. "Shhh.is ok sweetie. We are gonna get her back" said Prue trying to calm Piper.  
  
"You don't know that" Piper managed to say between sobs.  
  
"Look Piper, before you know we are gonna have her in our arms again ok? I promise you that" said Prue. But the truth was that in the bottom of her heart she had a really bad feeling about this warlock. 


	5. a way to comunicate

A way to communicate  
  
X x x x x x x x x -OLD HOUSE -x x x x x x x x x x X  
  
The warlock had fallen asleep on the only bed of the old house. Phoebe was sitting in the corner of the room crying her eyes out. She knew she has to be quite otherwise he would harm her more than he already had. She kept rocking back and forth trying to make sense to what Ikarias had done to her. He had raped her not doubt about it, but she couldn't let her sisters know he had, even thought she was sure they may not come to rescue her at all. After all the Ikarias had said to her she was convinced that her sisters hated her and were probably happy she hadn't come home. She pushed all her problems aside for a while and just focused her attention in trying to find a way out of that place. Only the thought of spending one more minute with him made her sick on her stomach. She looked around the room hoping to get an idea of how to escape this torture but apparently the spell Ikarias had cast also prevented anyone to get out of the house. Suddenly a wave of nausea hit her. She was having some sort of dream, like looking at a TV. She could see Prue and Piper hugging each other in the couch while Piper cried in Prue's arms. They were trying to communicate with her trough their minds mind.  
  
(Remember that Phoebe is communicating with them trough her mind. The story doesn't change if she's actually SPEAKING but remember that the warlock tends to get really mad if Phoebe disturbs Ikarias)  
  
"Phoebe?" called Prue feeling her sister's presence.  
  
"Prue?" asked a very confused phoebe.  
  
"Oh god, are you ok? Did he hurt you?" asked Piper immediately. She was so relief to hear her sister's voice that she couldn't help but to smile a little, even thought she wasn't sure if her sister was safe.  
  
Phoebe, after seeing her sisters crying for her, forgot all about the things the warlock had said to her.  
  
"Prue...Piper...is that really you? Please take me out of here, please?!" begged Phoebe as she started to cry again.  
  
"Phoebe, calm down sweetie. I need you to tell me where are you so we can take you out of that place ok?" said Prue as calm as she could. She was trying to be strong for Piper but just seeing how her sister was begging her to save her made her think the worst things about what had happen. What had Ikarias done to her? .Prue promised to herself right then that if he has touch her sister she would give him the most painful death.  
  
"I'm not sure.he blindfolded me, but I think somewhere near the library.I'm sorry I can't help." Phoebe cried even harder. She felt like such a screw up. 'Now wonder my sisters hate, I'm so worthless that I can't even help myself '. Phoebe pushed that thought out of her mind before her sisters could hear it, lucky for her they didn't. "Please help me.take me away from him please! I can't stand this anymore." Phoebe cried.  
  
"Honey." Prue started in fear. She had to ask otherwise she may never know why Phoebe felt so bad. " . What did he do to you?" asked Prue.  
  
"He, he." but Phoebe didn't get a chance to finish that sentence. Her crying became harder and woke up the warlock Ikarias. He walked over to her and started beating her harder than the last time before she got to say anything else to her sisters 


	6. doubts and comfort

Doubts and comfort  
  
"Phoebe? Phoebe?!...oh god!" yelled Piper. Realizing her younger sister was no longer with them, she fell on her knees to the ground. Prue catch her before she fell to the ground. Wrapping her arms around her from behind, they both fell to the floor crying hard on each others arms for their sister.  
  
X x x x x x x x x x LATER IN THE MANOR x x x x x x x x x X  
  
Prue and Piper were sitting on the couch. Their eyes were red a puffy for all the crying earlier on. Prue was stroking Piper's hair trying to get her to calm down, but it wasn't working. She would never calm down knowing her younger sister was alone with some monsters. The silence said it all, Phoebe was hurt somewhere locked in with some crazy warlock. But Piper eventually broke the silence.  
  
"Prue?" called Piper quietly.  
  
"Yeah sweetie?" asked Prue surprise to see Piper talking after the whole Phoebe thing.  
  
"What do you think Ikarias did to her?" asked Piper looking blankly to the window.  
  
Prue hesitated at first. The thought of anyone touching her baby sister was disgusting for Prue but she couldn't help but wonder herself, what was happening right now with her sister? Was she hurt? She pushed all her thoughts. She had to be strong for Piper; she couldn't let her see her fear.  
  
"I.I don't know. Let's hope she's nothing serious. All I know is that we're gonna have to be there for her we get her back" said Prue squeezing her sister's hand. Piper was loosing hope and Prue knew it. Prue was loosing hope too but she had to be strong for Piper no matter what.  
  
"Are we EVER gonna get her back?" asked Piper.  
  
Prue was a little taken back at Piper's question. The truth was she had been wondering the same thing since Leo came. She couldn't even picture herself and Piper living without Phoebe.  
  
"Of course we are honey" reassured Prue, but the tone in her voice said the opposed. Piper knew Prue was trying to be strong for her but she wished her sister would talk to her just once and tell her how she really felt. Prue knew they were gonna get her back but she could stop a little voice in the back of her head telling her that that may not happen. 'Phoebe may be dead right now and I don't know it' Prue thought. She could deal with Piper's agony, with scary demons and her own life all at the same time but she couldn't live not knowing if one of her sisters needs her help. Prue felt tremendous pain suddenly. 'Why does this have to happen to Phoebe?' Prue thought. 'Why now that she was finally getting her life back?' she asked herself. Life wasn't fair sometimes and right then it sucked for both sisters but they had to have faith.for Phoebe.  
  
Suddenly Leo orbed in with a huge grin on his face and an anxious look.  
  
Author's note:  
  
Did I mention I absolutely LOVE suspense? Well if I didn't then you know now. I'll try to update soon again, keep reviewing! And Thanks! For reading my story! (^_^) 


	7. The solution

The solution  
  
"Leo what's going on?" asked Piper getting up. So did Prue.  
  
"I know where Phoebe is" He said whit a grin on his face.  
  
"What?!" asked both sisters.  
  
"I know where Phoebe is, the elders sensed her" he explained.  
  
"Wha.b, but.how?" asked Prue confused. She couldn't help but to feel a little relief but she still wasn't sure of what Leo was telling her.  
  
"When you guys communicated with her the elders were able to sense her. Your connection with Phoebe broke Ikarias's the spell" Leo explained anxious.  
  
"Well.what are we waiting for? Let's get going!" said Piper happier than ever. Even thought everything was happening so fast, all she could think about was having Phoebe in her arms again. Like the sisters they were.  
  
"No, wait guys. You have to make the potion first remember?" said Leo.  
  
"Oh, right. Sorry Leo, we just got a little carried away" said Prue with a big smile on her face. They were finally going to take their sister away from that sick demon.  
  
X x x x x x x x x x x x x LATER x x x x x x x x x x x x xX  
  
"Ok, potion?" asked Prue.  
  
"Check" said Piper coming out of the kitchen showing Prue the potion.  
  
"Jackets?" asked Prue getting her's off the chair.  
  
Piper looked at her with questioning eyes.  
  
"What? It's cold outside" Prue explained.  
  
Piper rolled her eyes and took her jacket from the couch.  
  
"Supernatural transport?" asked Prue.  
  
Leo orbed in.  
  
"Check" he said with a smile. Both girls walked over to him as he put his arms around them and orbed out.  
  
X x x x x x x x x ABANDONED HOUSE x x x x x x x x x X  
  
Leo orbed in quietly outside the house.  
  
"What is this place?" asked Prue disgusted for all the trash and mousse that were outside the old building.  
  
"Well obviously it's not a mansion so I'm guessing it's abandoned?" said Piper.  
  
"Yeah." said Leo looking at it.  
  
"Ok, what are we waiting for? Let's get going" said Prue already walking toward the door.  
  
"What's the plan? We go in, we kick his but, we take Phoebe and get the hell out of there" said Piper.  
  
"Piper Ikarias is very powerful" said Leo warning them.  
  
"Yeah, yeah, yeah you've said that like a million times. Now, come on" said Piper taking Prue's arm. They kicked the door and it fell to the ground. As it hit the floor a human figure jumped from a bed in one corner of the room.  
  
"What the hell. " Ikarias yelled angry.  
  
"We are hell"yelled Prue.  
  
With the wave of her hand she send Ikarias to the wall. He fell to the floor out cold.  
  
"Yeah Leo he's way too powerful for us" whispered Piper sarcastically to Leo.  
  
Leo looked over to the other corner of the room where Phoebe sat rocking back and forth crying with her hands covering her head. He ran over to her to heal her.  
  
The girls looked to where Leo was going. Then they saw their sister, crying like a baby calling for it's mother.  
  
"Pheebs." Prue didn't get a chance to finish that sentence. Ikarias was already up and ready to attack them  
  
"NOW!!!" yelled Leo seeing that the girls were getting distracted by Phoebe and hadn't notice him right behind them.  
  
Prue and Piper turned to face the demon but before Ikarias could do anything to them Prue and Piper threw him the potion. He fell on his knees in pain while the fire consumed him 'till he was gone. The sisters looked at each other in satisfaction. Then they remembered the main reason why they were there, to rescue their baby sister. Leo was still healing all of her bruised for all the beating and stuff, but he knew that there were wounds he wasn't gonna be able to heal; what he had done to her. He had taken away all the innocence, her had humiliated her.he had raped her. 


	8. the not so good ride home

The not-so-good ride back home  
  
Author's note:  
  
First of all, Thanks for all the reviews. I took all the advices you guys gave me and changed most of the chapters. Nothing big really, I just added some things to each chapter to complete the story, so check it out. You know the drill, review more and I'll post soon. I'm not sure when since Christmas is coming soon, but I promise to update as soon as possible, bye! HAPPY CHRISTMAS FOR ALL OF YOU READERS! (^_^)  
  
The ride home was silent. No word were spoken between the sisters since no of them knew what to say to Phoebe. Prue wanted to run to Phoebe. To Hugh her and tell her that everything was going to be all right, but she knew that that wasn't going to happen. Things were eventually going to be better, but not for a while now.  
  
Piper was thinking the same things as Prue. She was just so relief to have her sister back, but she also knew that the worst was about to come.  
  
They finally arrived home after of what seemed like forever. Prue got out of the car after Piper. They were both waiting for Phoebe to step out of the car so they could finally Hugh her and have the sister moment they deserved after the events earlier that day, but they knew it was probably too soon for Phoebe.  
  
After a few seconds of waiting for their sister Prue got a little closer to the window of the car to check on Phoebe; there she saw her sister making no effort to move. Instead she was resting her head against the window looking distant; she was stuck in her own world. It was going to be a long healing process, and it hadn't even started yet. Prue opened the other door of the car carefully not to disturb her sister. The last thing she wanted was to make Phoebe angry; otherwise she may never talk to her about what happened. Prue didn't want her to do that, especially not in a time when Phoebe needs her most.  
  
"Phoebe, honey?" called Prue trying to sound as sweet as possible. But Phoebe didn't even notice her; she just kept looking to the window like she wasn't even there.  
  
"Pheebs" called Prue again, this time louder to get Phoebe's attention. She got closer to Phoebe and gently touched her shoulder. Phoebe flinched at Prue's touch. She had been thinking about that place, that place where he hurt her so much. It didn't matter if it was Prue or Piper who touched her. She still felt the cold hands of Ikarias (yes, I finally decided to call the warlock Ikarias) touching her. She had been so absorbed in her own thinking that she hadn't notice that they were home already.  
  
Phoebe saw Prue's concerned face after she flinched away from her touch, but she decided not to do anything about it. She had enough with her feelings like to be dealing with Prue's too.  
  
"Sorry, I didn't notice we were already here" whispered Phoebe. She managed to smile even thought she wanted to scream. She had to talk really quite otherwise the tears she had been holding down would fall. She saw Prue giving her a warm smile in reassurance.  
  
She got out of the car slowly, not to hurt her knee even more than it already was. Piper went over to Phoebe and wrapped her arms around her shoulders.  
  
"I'm fine" Phoebe said coldly. She didn't want to be so cruel with her sisters but for some reason the words of Ikarias wouldn't leave her head. 'My sisters don't love me' she thought. "No" Phoebe muttered to herself unconsciously while shacking her head trying to get those words out of her head.  
  
"No what sweetie?" asked Piper trying not to push her.  
  
'Look at them pretending to actually care' the voice said in her head. "Nothing" said Phoebe ignoring the voice. 'Why do you bother in talking to them if they don't even listen to you?!' the voice told her again. 'They don't care!' the voice yelled.  
  
"Yes they do" Phoebe said aloud. The only way to shut the voice out was by talking. "Phoebe are you ok?" Prue asked concerned. It wasn't common to see someone talking to themselves.  
  
"Yeah, I'm great" said Phoebe sarcastically. She rushed to the stairs before her sisters got to say anything to her.  
  
"Pheebs wait!" called Piper.  
  
'Great. Here comes the "we love you" and "talk to us" speech. What a bunch of crap!' the voice yelled to Phoebe at the back of her head. Phoebe tried to ignore the voice again but this time she couldn't, it had made her mad. She stopped halfway to the stairs but decided not to make any eye contact so they wouldn't see that she was about to cry.  
  
"Yes?" Phoebe asked without facing them.  
  
"We want to talk to you" said Piper sweetly.  
  
"About?" asked Phoebe knowing what it was about.  
  
"Ikarias" said Prue trying to catch her sister's reaction.  
  
Phoebe flinched at the sound of his name. She hated it so badly, more like she hated herself for letting him touch her like that. 'Why did I let him do that to me?' Phoebe thought.  
  
"I don't want to talk" Phoebe said at the edge of tears.  
  
"Phoebe." Prue started.  
  
"I said I didn't want to talk about it!" Phoebe yelled angry. With that she ran upstairs to her room.  
  
Why couldn't they just leave her alone? Couldn't they see that she was hurting right then? 'They don't want to see it' the voice said to her.' They have enough problems in their life like to be thinking about you' the voice told her. "They do care, if they didn't then they wouldn't have try to talk to me" Phoebe told herself in order to shut down the voice in her head. She couldn't help but to feel a little guilty. They were only trying to help her and she had pushed them away. Phoebe mentally kicked herself for it. 'If you wouldn't of been so stupid and weak against that warlock none of this would of happened' the voice told her. "It's true, it's my fault. If I would have been more responsible and had been home at time my sisters wouldn't be so hurt and worry" Phoebe said to herself as she started to cry.' why didn't I fight him? Why did I let him do that to me? 


	9. Their thoguhts after the incident

Their thought after the incident  
  
Author's note:  
  
Sorry for no updating sooner. Thanks for all the support of you readers, you don't know the satisfaction you feel when someone tells you that they love your story. The next chapters will be kind of sad, I'm trying to focus on their thoughts and feeling more than focusing on what they say. Thanks, keep reviewing please.  
  
Prue was mentally kicking beating herself up.' Way to go Prue! You had to push her didn't you?' she thought in anguish. 'Now she'll never talk to me' Prue thought.  
  
Piper could see the conflict going on her sister's mind. She knew that Prue was probably blaming herself like she always did when something bad happen to either one of her sisters. Piper didn't know what to do. She still wasn't over the fact that they almost lost their baby sister to that monster. Now she was home and safe but still so far away from them.emotionally.  
  
Phoebe always came to Piper in this kind of situation, whenever she had a problem she would tell Piper first and usually Piper would give her an advice on what to do or something, but now Piper didn't know what to say to her. She didn't even know what happened yet.  
  
They had never dealt with anything like that before. The only thing Piper wished for was for Phoebe to open up to her and tell her what happened in that place. But Piper knew Phoebe wasn't ready for it yet, and Piper wasn't ready to hear it either.  
  
X x x x x x x x x x x x PHOEBE'S ROOM x x x x x x x x x x x x x X  
  
Phoebe locked the door of her room and practically threw herself on her bed sobbing uncontrollably. She cried like she did the first time he had touched her like that. She wanted to run to her sisters, to cry in their arms and tell them everything about Ikarias, but the voices in the back of her head didn't let her. She knew she was gonna have to talk about deal with everything that happened at some point, and she wanted to deal with it alone in her own time. Right now all she wanted was to forget about it and just get her life back.  
  
'Why can't they just leave me alone?' Phoebe thought. 'Why can't they stay out of my life? Don't they see I'm hurting right now' she thought. She immediately stopped herself. ' If they get involved in my life it's just because they love me' she thought. She had no right to think that kind of things about her sisters when they risked they life against that demon trying to save her.  
  
After hour of crying she finally got out of her room and decided to head to the bathroom to take a shower. She felt disgusted with herself, so dirty. She stepped in to the bathroom and looked at herself in the mirror. She could not stand to see herself like that. He had taken all the beauty away from her, away from her body. He had marked her body with his touch, and the mark of that would never go away.  
  
She could feel the burden in her bruises as the water ran through her body. Leo had healed most of the wounds but before he could finish healing her he got called away for a meeting with the elders apparently.  
  
She grabbed a towel and wrapped herself in it. She then looked at the mirror once again. She stared at her body for a while, watching all the bruises on it, all the scars he had left on her. Her body was his forever. She felt used and humiliated. She looked upon her own reflection and it made her sick  
  
"He was right. I'm not beautiful" she whispered to herself at the edge of tears. 'I'm not funny or smart' she thought, not been able to talk anymore because of the tears. 'Otherwise I could have had stopped him but I didn't. I allowed him to do that to me' she thought. It was her fault.unless she fell that way.  
  
She knew Prue was probably blaming herself as well but she couldn't talk to her yet. Not right now. As much as she needed comforting at that moment she couldn't talk to her sisters yet. Why? Because Piper wasn't gonna be able to handle it, and Prue was too strong and stubborn like to comfort her. 'It's not like you need their comfort anyway' the voice told her. Phoebe was about to think in something to disagree with her last thought but she couldn't help but to agree with it.  
  
"I don't need their comfort, of their pity" she said to herself still looking at the mirror. 'Even if I tell them what happened they would blame me anyway, or be embarrassed for having a sister like me' she thought already feeling her anger against them.  
  
And with those thoughts in her head she went to bed again. She went to bed with all the guilt, the pain and the anger against her own sisters. 


	10. My secret to avoid the pain

Something to avoid the pain  
  
Author's note: Did you guys like the last chapter? I hope you did coz the next chapters are gonna be just like that. I'm trying to describe what every sister's feeling and thinking so I hope you like it. If the next chapters are crap please tell me and I'll erase them, thanks. Please review more!!!! I'm still trying to think of a continuation but I promise to update if all of you readers review!!!!  
  
Phoebe tried to sleep but it was useless. She couldn't stop thinking about that day. The way he touched her, the things he said didn't seem to leave her mind.  
  
She got out of bed and made her way to the bathroom. She washed her face again and again trying to wash her feelings away, but she finally realized that no matter how many times she washed herself, her nightmares wouldn't stop.  
  
She rested her head against the washstand looking blankly at her feet. What was she gonna do? Was there anything that could take all this pain away? ...maybe there was.  
  
Looking down she noticed that one of the drawers was half open, reveling a small white bottle. Since she didn't have anything else to do, and she obviously wasn't gonna get any sleep that night, she took the bottle in her hands to see what it was  
  
Apparently they were pills for insomnia, 'Just my luck' Phoebe thought. Without even thinking it, she opened the bottle and took a couple of pills in her hand. The diagnosis said to take 2 pills but Phoebe in the middle of a possible breakdown, took 3 pills. She just wanted to make the pills go away and she was sure that 2 pills wouldn't do it.  
  
She went back to bed and just sat there staring at the ceiling. After a couple of minutes she started feeling the effects of the pills on her body already. She was so relax, so happy. All her problems seemed a little stupid right then. She wished she could feel like that all day and not feel the pain instead, the pain of the memories since Ikarias.  
  
'Maybe I CAN fell like that all day' she thought. Phoebe walked over to the bathroom again. She looked around to see if the coast was clear. She opened the drawer, the one that contained the pills, and took the small bottle in her hand. She checked in the drawers to see if there was any other medicament to make her feel better.  
  
She found some pills against anxiety and depression. She remembered then that Piper used to take them after she had a little nervous breakdown in high school because of all the jerks that made fun of her and stuff. She took them too an decided to take them in the morning just in case she was feeling bad.  
  
She went to her bedroom again walking cautiously not to wake one of her sisters that were probably keeping an eye on her from their own bedrooms. She walked quickly to her bed and hide the bottles in her nightstand behind a bunch of papers and stuff just to make sure her sisters won't find it. 'Now I can take them again sometime just incase' she thought. It was amazing how a little pill could make you feel so good, how it could take all your pain away.  
  
She had tried everything to make the pain go away but now thanks to the pills she didn't feel anything but happiness.  
  
With a smile on her face, Phoebe went to bed again. She feel asleep almost immediately thanks to her little bottles that was now hiding in the bottom of her nightstand.  
  
It was her little secret, her little "painkillers", that was all she needed to move on. 'I was right I didn't need my sister's comfort to get through this, I didn't need to talk about this to feel better. All I needed was a little push, a little help' Phoebe thought.  
  
And now she have this "help" save in a drawer so she could take them over and over again.becoming slowly addicted to them.  
  
Phoebe woke up after long hours of sleeping. She had heard her sisters in her room before but even when she tried, she couldn't even move a muscle. The pills were so strong that they slowly took over her entire body until she was completely drugged. But she didn't care since all her pain, fears, and all the anger she fell last night was gone.  
  
She felt stupid, after all her weeping and the crying. She could see everything so clear now. The pills didn't only help her think clearer; they also made her feel better about herself and everyone else, unless she thought. She fell so much powerful now, with so much energy and in control of the situation.  
  
She finally got out of bed. She opened her eyes slowly with all her strength. She was surprise of how much her head hurt. She managed to sit up on her bed while everything around her seemed to spin. She saw everything blurry. Shaking her head she finally got her vision back. 'Why do I feel so bad?' she thought. It didn't make any sense. Phoebe tried to remember last night events but all she got were fuzzy memories. Then she looked to her right; the drawers.  
  
She remembered going to the bathroom to her something for her pain. She remembered taking the pills in her hand and swallowing them with some water. 'Are they still there?' She wondered. She opened the drawer and found the small bottles that had made her company in the night.  
  
The sudden smell of Piper's cooking coming from the kitchen, all the way to Phoebe's room brought her back from her thoughts. Phoebe started walking towards the stairs almost unconsciously because of the delicious smell. She stopped at the top of the stairs when she heard her sister's voices. Did she really wanna face them after last night? She would have to face them someday, after all they did live under the same roof, but could she face them now?  
  
She went back to her room to do some thinking before deciding anything else.  
  
'Maybe if I take those I'll feel better. It worked last night' she thought looking to the drawers. She opened the other bottle, the one that Piper used to have when she was a teen, and took 2 pills; the same dose in Piper's diagnosis. She quickly swallowed them afraid to change her mind if she kept thinking. Now she could face them.  
  
She waited a couple of minutes for the pills to make effect. She finally felt the strength she needed, the energy and happiness. The sweet sensation that told her that everything was gonna be alright and that she had nothing to worry about.  
  
With a huge grin on her face she made her way to the kitchen. completely drugged. 


	11. Phoebe's odd behavior

Phoebe's odd behavior  
  
Author's note: Sorry it took me so long to update. I have been very busy with Christmas and all. By the way, MERRY CHRISTMAS TO ALL OF YOU READERS! I promise to keep updating .if you promise to keep reviewing. I'm not gonna update 'till I get unless 3 more reviews. I know it sounds mean but I just wanna know what you guys think of my story. Should I keep writing?  
  
Phoebe came downstairs dressed casually.  
  
Prue and Piper were in the kitchen making small talk over breakfast as usual. Well not as usual. Both sisters were worrying sick about the youngest one. They had heard her in the bathroom last night and knew she wasn't having a good night of sleep.  
  
They didn't know what to think since they still didn't know what had happened. What had he done to their baby sister?  
  
"Morning Pheebs" said Prue surprise to see a smile on her sister's face.  
  
"Oh, morning guys" Phoebe answered. She was still in the effects of the pills she just took. 'This anti-depression pills re great!' she thought. But even thought she was drugged, she couldn't help but to hide the smile on her face after seeing her sisters.  
  
She felt kind of guilty for yelling at them last night, but she felt even more guilty for what happened with Ikarias and making her sisters worry. 'I don't deserve their concern' Phoebe thought. Usually that thought would have brought tears to her eyes but the drugs were keeping her from feeling anything at all.  
  
"You're up early" Piper exclaimed. She couldn't help but to say that with a little tone of concern in her voice.  
  
"Yeah well, it's a beautiful day outside" Phoebe said cheery.  
  
"Are you feeling ok?" asked Prue carefully while sharing a concerned look with Piper for their sister. It wasn't that they didn't enjoy seeing her so happy, especially after the past events. It was just that they weren't expecting that kind of reaction from her after everything they had gone though.  
  
"Yes, very good" Phoebe said pouring herself some coffee.  
  
"Ok then" Piper said not too convinced.  
  
Prue and Piper shared a concerned look for the second time that morning, but instead of dealing with it they decided to just let it go and deal with what's really important.talk to Phoebe.  
  
The three of them sat in uncomfortable silence. None of them knew what to say to or what to talk about.  
  
Prue was still thinking about Phoebe. She hadn't told them anything yet but rue was expecting that much from her sister. Piper, on the other hand, was still observing Phoebe's odd attitude. It was a totally opposed Phoebe compared to the attitude last night.  
  
Phoebe was having a great breakfast in her great perfect world. Unless she felt that way. The pills were the only thing that stopped her from thinking about Ikarias. With the drugs she could pretend like everything was the same and that nothing had happened, and she was loving that feeling even thought it was a complete lie.  
  
After breakfast Piper washed the dishes and Prue had stayed in to help her and talk about Phoebe's odd behavior.  
  
"Did you notice something different about Phoebe?" asked Piper trying to start a conversation with Prue. Piper could swear she had seen something different in Phoebe's eyes but she couldn't quite put her finger on it.  
  
"Well she did seem awfully.happy..unless happier than last night" said Prue with a serious face that Piper noticed.  
  
"Is that a bad thing?" Piper asked trying to get Prue to open up to her once and for all.  
  
"Maybe" Prue said in deep thought." I mean, it's definitely not how I expected her to react after this whole deal with Ikarias and all"  
  
"Me neither" said Piper thoughtful too." You think we should be worried?" asked Piper concerned.  
  
"I'm already worried" Prue stated. "After Ikarias, then the whole yelling last night and now this? How can I not be?" Prue said desperate.  
  
"Yeah, you're right. We should definitely say something to her, but when? And what are we gonna say to her?" asked Piper nervously.  
  
"Piper, you can't plan this kind of things, we have to tell her what we feel and that we're worried about her" said Prue frankly.  
  
"Well, what if she rejects us? What if she yells at us like she already did?" Piper asked scared.  
  
"Piper! You're so insecure! Don't worry, it's just Phoebe. She's not gonna bit our head off for trying to talk to her" said Prue.  
  
"Let's hope so" said Piper half joking.  
  
While the sister kept talking about random topics, they were completely unaware of what Phoebe was doing upstairs. 


	12. Just before the talk

Just before the talk  
  
Author's note: I'm soooooo sorry it's been so long since I last update. With the whole Christmas thing and my family and friends I hadn't found time to update.but I found time now! :-) hope you like this next chapter. Please review it !  
  
X x x x x x x x x x x x PHOEBE'S ROOM x x x x x x x x x x x x x X  
  
Phoebe was sitting in her bed, holding her knees close to her chest. The "happy-Phoebe" was gone and now all that was left was a "totally- screwed- up" Phoebe. All the pain had come back to her, the pain she didn't wanna face.  
  
A single tear made its way down her face, but she had no idea why. One minute she was happy with her sisters and the next everything went crazy. She had all of these memories she couldn't erase, and the guilt that made her chest hurt. But what hurt her most was the feeling of humiliation. The way she felt right after he stopped rapping her. It was then when she realized that her life was never gonna be the same, no matter how hard she tried 'cause no matter what she'll do, he'll always be in her nightmares and her memory.  
  
She felt so alone, so ashamed, so guilty, but the worst part was that the voices were coming back to her now; the voice of her own conscience that reminded her that it was all her fault.  
  
She was already getting use to hearing it by now; so much that she was beginning to confuse her own thoughts with it. or did she really thought the same things? in a way she did believe them. After all, it was the truth.unless she felt that way.  
  
'It doesn't have to be this way' the voice in her conscience told her. 'You don't have to feel all of this pain' the voice said.  
  
She knew what it was all about, the pills; the only thing that kept her from the pain and from her own thoughts. She had thought about taking them before but she didn't want to pass out or something because of an overdose.  
  
"No, I can't take them" she said to herself. But it was too late; she was already giving in into the idea. The pain was too much. 'Why not? What's the worst thing that can happen?' she thought trying to convince herself that what she was dong was a good idea.' Even it I do have an overdose, I'll jus die. Unless that way I won't have to feel all of this or think all of this things' she thought. But what about her sisters? Would they care if she died?  
  
"Of course they'd care" Phoebe assured herself. But she was very unconvinced.  
  
She couldn't do it; she couldn't possibly do that to her sisters. Phoebe knew they just wouldn't be able to handle it.  
  
Just then a soft knock on the door brought her back to reality from her own thinking, thank god.  
  
'Great! They're here!' she thought sarcastically, 'After they see me like this they'll probably start worrying again' Phoebe thought.  
  
"Its open" said Phoebe. She was surprised to hear her own voice so clear even thought she had been crying for hours.  
  
Prue and Piper opened the door carefully not to disturb their little sister even more. The minute Prue and Piper saw Phoebe's face they could tell she had been crying. It was very weird considering that just a couple of hours ago Phoebe seamed like the happiest girl in the world. It didn't make any sense.  
  
Prue sat next to Phoebe in her bed while Piper sat in front of her. Phoebe, with arms strongly wrapping her knees, rocked herself back and forth trying to compose herself a little even thought she was in the middle of a breakdown. She kept moving trying to distract herself but at that point nothing could distract her from what she was feeling and thinking.  
  
Phoebe noticed the pain and grief in her sister's face when they saw her like that. She touched her cheek and noticed that they were wet from all her crying. 'They obviously noticed' she thought in disgust. But what could she do at that point? There was no sense in lying.  
  
The truth was hat she didn't really care. She was feeling so depress right then that she could barely think straight. Usually she would of tried to hide her tears, to spare them the pain of seeing her crying, but her own pain was so big that everything else just didn't matter.  
  
Phoebe looked at them awkwardly. She wanted to be left alone so bad that she was wiling to kick her own sisters out of her room, even thought the consequences would be terrible, but she just didn't have enough strength or enough power to do that.  
  
She gave them a shy look trying to make them realize that she didn't want them in her room. But they just looked at her determinate; they had obviously decided to talk her straight.  
  
They couldn't have picked a worst time. Phoebe could barely whisper, if only, and she felt like screaming at them. Shut everyone out of her world where she could be safe and alone.  
  
Prue took Phoebe's hand. Immediately Phoebe looked at her surprised to see Prue actually reaching out for her, but not in the right time. Her hand was shacking a little, mostly because of the pills she had took earlier that morning, but Prue's hand on hers seamed to calmed her down a little.  
  
"Phoebe" Prue started.  
  
PUM, PUM, PUM! I left you in suspense again. Sorry if I do that a lot but I just like to finish every chapter with a great ending. I don't know When I'll post the next chapter so.don't expect to see it any time soon. PLEASE REVIEW!!!! 


	13. Tears before a confession Just before th...

Tears before a confession (just before the talk: part 2)  
  
Author's note:  
  
I know, I'm evil, I just haven't found time to write the chapter where Phoebe had "the conversation" with her sisters. I already have it on paper but I need to write it on my computer first so.sorry it took me so long to update but things have been crazy around my house. Besides, I don't like to write when we have guest in the house; it's a little embarrassing for me to say that I write fan fictions on my free time. I anybody could convince me that writing in my free time when I'm only 13 years old is not weird, that'd be great! Thanks for reading! I'm not gonna update 'till I get unless 5 more reviews.  
  
.now on with the story:  
  
"Phoebe" Prue started. She paused before continuing, not sure of what to say seeing her sister's condition. "We just wanted to talk to you. I know things have been a little tense around the house the last couple of days since.since you.came back to us." Prue stopped to see her sister's reaction; nothing. She looked at Prue distant on her own thoughts. Prue decided to keep going. "Look, we don't know for sure what happened with Ikarias."  
  
"But whatever it was.you can tell us" Piper finished Prue's sentence. She reached out for Phoebe and put her hand on Phoebe's back trying to get her to open up once and for all. Phoebe was so tense that her body actually hurt.  
  
Both Piper and Prue looked at Phoebe expecting a response, or unless to hear something from Phoebe. But they didn't. Phoebe looked at them in the eyes with obvious pain and shame showing on her face, but also something else, misunderstanding.  
  
Phoebe looked at them both in despise. She didn't want to talk about it and she thought she had made that clear to her sisters. 'Maybe they don't understand me as much as I thought' Phoebe thought to herself in anger. If they couldn't take a hint about what she wanted then how could she ever talk to them? 'They wouldn't understand me' she thought.  
  
She felt angry. She hated this; Prue and Piper used to be able to read her like a book, especially Piper, used to know her inside out. But now when she needed them the most, when she needed their understanding and support, they couldn't support her.  
  
"I really don't want to talk right now" Phoebe said in a harsh tone. She stud up and went over to the window trying to avoid eye contact.  
  
Prue and Piper stud up in concern for their sister. She was crankier than ever for absolutely no reason; she looked pale and tired.not like the usual Phoebe.  
  
Prue stared at Piper with a panic face. Prue could see something else on Phoebe. She was definitely hiding something from them, beside the whole deal with Ikarias; she was acting very strange. Prue pushed that thought away in order to concentrate in talking to Phoebe, or rather making Phoebe talk. They knew that whatever it was he did to her it had to be big, otherwise she would have just told them. They had a pretty good idea of what it was but they wanted to hear it from Phoebe's mouth first before jumping into conclusions.  
  
"Phoebe.look, we're only trying to help you but we can't if you don't let us" Seeing that Phoebe didn't react at this comment Piper continued talking. "Seeing you like this is killing us, don't you see that? Especially when we know we can help. You don't have to tell us right away but we want you to know that you can talk to us always. Ok?"  
  
Phoebe. After hearing Piper's "speech", couldn't take it anymore. She couldn't stop the tears that were now rolling down her face. Remembering all the pain, all the shame, the way he had humiliated her. She still wasn't sure if she wanted to tell her sisters but she knew they were right. 'Maybe they CAN help me' she thought between sniffs.  
  
Prue heard her sister's sniffs and then noticed that Phoebe's whole body was now shacking. Prue, seeing her sister cry, immediately went over to her and pulled Phoebe into a big, tight hug from behind.  
  
Piper was a little scared. Seeing Phoebe in such a bad shape broke her heart, but she also knew that Phoebe only cried when she couldn't take it anymore.  
  
For Prue's surprise Phoebe didn't try to pull away, but she didn't exactly hug her back either. Even thought a minute ago she was totally furious with her sisters now all she wanted was to cry on their arms.  
  
Piper went over to her sisters and hugged Phoebe from the other side. Phoebe cried for hours in her sister's arms. She let it all out, letting Prue comfort as much as she wanted to. 


	14. My decision

My decision  
  
Author's note: What do you know, I updated for the second time today. I decided to post unless 3 chapters today so.hope you enjoy it. Thanks for reading! PLEASE REVIEW!  
  
After a couple of hours of crying, Phoebe finally calmed down a little on her sisters arms. She had cried so hard that her eyes actually hurt.  
  
Prue was the first one to pull away from their hug. She knew how Phoebe was feeling and she was hoping that Phoebe would talk to them now. She had so many questions, so many doubts, so many thoughts that she didn't knew where to start. But she also knew Phoebe too well. Phoebe always came to them when she felt it was the right time, after doing her own thinking.  
  
Phoebe saw her sisters looking at her. She knew they were expecting to hear some answers from her but she was just too tired. The pills she had took were loosing their effect on her and she could already feel all the pain and fear building inside of her. 'I can't talk to the like this' she thought. 'I need to take my pills again and after feeling better I'll talk to them' she thought. Taking pills seamed so normal to her now.  
  
"Pheebs" Prue called her sister's attention. Phoebe looked up to her realizing she had been ignoring her sisters while thinking. She could see all the concern in Prue's blue eyes, but he could also see all the love reflected on both sisters.  
  
"How're you feeling?" asked Prue trying to start a conversation.  
  
"I'm.feeling a little better, thanks" said Phoebe silent.  
  
This made Piper and Prue to realize that she wasn't fine at all, and that she probably wasn't ready to talk yet.  
  
"Do you wanna.talk.about it?" asked Piper carefully. She didn't wanna push her sister, not after seeing her nervous breakdown a while ago. All she wanted to do was to know what happened, so she could help her sister deal with it once and for all. But she new it wasn't up to her to talk about it.  
  
"I'm exhausted right now. All I want to do is sleep and forget all about that horrible day" Phoebe cried remembering Ikarias. She looked up to see her sister's disappointed face.  
  
"But we can talk about it in the morning" Phoebe said. 'I can't believe I just said that!' Phoebe mentally kicked herself. 'Am I really gonna talk about it with them?' she wondered to herself.  
  
After seeing how much her sister's had helped her that day she decided to talk to them. She was gonna tell her sisters about Ikarias.  
  
Both Prue and Piper smiled brightly after hearing Phoebe say that. It didn't only mean that they would finally know what happened, it also meant that the healing process had begun. It was gonna be a long road to recovery, but unless it had already started.  
  
"No problem honey" said Prue still smiling. She got closer to Phoebe and kissed her on the forehead.  
  
"Good night phoebe, I love you" Prue whispered in Phoebe's ear.  
  
Piper went over to Phoebe and hugged her as tight as possible. She kissed Phoebe on the check and then on the forehead.  
  
"Sleep tight hun. If you need anything during the night just yell ok?" said Piper stoking Phoebe's hair.  
  
"Ok" Phoebe smiled.  
  
Both sister got out of Phoebe's room and made their ways to their own rooms.  
  
Phoebe's smile was still there after her sister's had left the room. She felt so happy, so relief. She had finally cried to her sisters letting go of all her pain. But now the scary part was yet to come. Phoebe's smile faded in fear with that thought. 'How can I ever talk about it?' she thought.  
  
Getting all depressed once again, she looked over to her drawers. She opened and took two pills on her hands. 'How can something so small make feel so much better?' she wondered. She quickly swallowed the pills without even thinking about it with some water she had left on her night stand the day before to do the exact same thing.  
  
After a couple of minutes she was already feeling happy again. Relaxed and calmed she went to sleep almost immediately, knowing she wasn't going to have nightmares that night. She never did after taking her pills. 


	15. Phoebe's thoughts

Phoebe's thoughts  
  
Author's note: Hey, what do you know (Again) I decided to update for the third time today. I'm trying to get to the good part already so.hope you also like this chapter. PEASE REVIEW!  
  
NEXT MORNING.  
  
Phoebe lay on her bed; all the sheets covering her. The sunshine coming though the window stroke right on her faces, making her wake up from her wonderful dream.  
  
The nightmares had stopped ever since she started taking Piper's old pills and she had no intent on stopping.  
  
It had been a while since Phoebe had felt so alive, so wild. When she took them she didn't feel depressed at all, she felt the absolutely apposed. The only bad parts were the minutes after the effects on her had gone. She started feeling nauseas, dizzy, tremendously hungry and totally paranoid and nervous.  
  
She was becoming so dependant on the pills that her body actually started shacking uncontrollably if she didn't take them.  
  
She remembered seeing a couple of mysterious guys outside P3 two weeks ago, they were drug dealers. She then started wondering about it. 'Could they make me feel better than my pills? How much do they cost? Maybe I should try them one of this days' she thought.  
  
She had heard, ever since she was in high school, that when you got high the feeling was so good that you felt like if you were in a totally different world, like all of you problems didn't exist. That's exactly what she needed, to make her problems disappear. Of course she had also heard the terrible consequences of doing drugs but she knew that no pain could be bigger than what she was feeling now.  
  
She decided to stay in bed for a couple of hours before going downstairs with her sisters. She was supposed to have "the talk" with her sisters today and it was freaking her out.  
  
'If I could only take back what I said the night before' Phoebe wished. But it was useless; She had told them she would tell them today and she knew her sisters weren't about to give up 'till she did.  
  
She thought that telling her sisters was worse. 'After all, I would only be adding more pain to them' she thought. She hated to see her sisters in pain about something, especially when it was for her.  
  
Phoebe got up from her bed with the final thought of talking to them and finally sort things out before everything got worse.' As if they could be.' Phoebe thought.  
  
Of course the second thought in Phoebe's head was: 'Where are my pills?' She went to take a shower and take her pills so she could go to her sisters looking happy and not depressed like she did yesterday.  
  
After taking a couple of them, she got showered as she planned and put on her casual "Saturday clothes".  
  
The pills practically forced her to smiles, but she made her biggest effort to hide her smile before her sisters noticed that something was different.  
  
She may be ready to talk to them about the rape, but the pills were out of limits. That was HER little secret, her "safe heaven". She knew that if she told them they would take them away from her and she was sure that she would not be able to cope with her pain without them. She wasn't ready to give them up yet.  
  
All dressed up she made her way downstairs to the kitchen where her sisters were waiting for her to eat breakfast and then TALK. 


	16. The talk

The talk  
  
Author's note: Ok so this chapter is gonna be rather long because it's the main chapter in the story so I thought I may extend it. Hope you enjoy it, please review1 I'm starting to think you guys don't like my stories anymore *cries*  
  
I made some arrangements on chapter 15 so, read it again!  
  
X x x x x x x x x x x x x KITCHEN x x x x x x x x x x x X  
  
Prue and Piper had decided not to talk about "It" until after breakfast. Of course, that left them with absolutely no other topic to discuss over breakfast.  
  
Their lives had been the same for weeks now, besides of everything that just happened with Phoebe, they had nothing new in their lives.P3 was one of the coolest clubs in San Francisco and Prue was starting to be very well known between the photographers in the city and the magazines.  
  
Piper's thoughts were concentrated on Phoebe. She kept wondering if there was anything she could have done to keep her from this nightmare, but there wasn't. The most she could do was talk to her and support her every step of the way to recuperation. Of course, she also knew that she couldn't help Phoebe unless she wanted to be helped.  
  
Prue's thoughts were mainly on Ikarias. What had he done to her baby sister? 'Could he have.raped.her?' she thought. Prue pushed that horrible thought out of her head. 'He couldn't have.could he?' she wondered in horror. If he had then she was gonna have to support Phoebe more than ever 'cause this could tear her apart. If he hadn't then Prue really didn't know what else could torment her sister like that.  
  
Both sisters glared to the stairs when they heard someone coming down. It was Phoebe, no less, in her casual clothe for a Saturday morning coming for breakfast.  
  
She looked quite normal, a little too happy, but normal anyway. After least night's conversation they had expected her to be a bit more depressed or upset.but she wasn't.  
  
After their usual morning conversation and breakfast, the Halliwells walked to the sunroom where they agreed to discuss Phoebe's situation once and for all.  
  
Phoebe sat on the couch facing her sisters that were sitting on another couch in front of her. Her hands were shacking and she was sweating like she never had before. She totally panicked in front of her sisters.  
  
Piper, seeing her sister's distress, took Phoebe's hand on her own and squeezed it strongly trying to give her any support she could at that moment.  
  
"Whenever you're ready Pheebs" said Piper lovingly.  
  
"Take your time sweetie" added Prue. Both Piper and Prue knew that if they pushed her with questions and all she may never come to them again.  
  
"Ok" Phoebe managed to say trying to get her ideas in order. "I just.I don't know where to start" she said helpless.  
  
"How about the library?" suggested Piper.  
  
Phoebe then started to tell them her side of the story. She told them about how he took her to that horrible place and how he hit her every time she cried or said something. The way he had yelled at her and the awful things he had made her believe.  
  
Standing up not to face her sisters, Phoebe walked to the window with teary eyes. 'I can do this.' she encouraged herself. Piper and Prue also stood up in concerned for their sister. They didn't know what to expect, what was she gonna say next? They had enough with what they had heard already.  
  
She finally found her voice and started telling them of how he ripped off her clothes, how he brutally beat her when she tried to get away from him. Then she told them of how he raped her. The way he pulled her legs apart and laughed of her screams of pain. The way he touched her everywhere while she sobbed.  
  
This statement pushed Prue and Piper to the edge. The bastard had raped her little sister.  
  
The manor kept silent for a minute and the only thing heard where the sobs of the youngest. Piper had tears streaming down her face already but her face was emotionless. She was too horrified like to react mentally but he was still crying. She could picture her sister's face while he tormented her.  
  
Prue's eyes were full of tears. She felt like to throw up, like if someone had just punched her on the stomach. She could clearly see Ikarias face on her mind; laughing with his evil smile. She couldn't believe someone would touch her sister like that, her baby sister no less. How can someone do that to a person? Especially Phoebe who was so loving and sweet. Phoebe had the biggest heart Prue had never seen and he had taken full advantage of her. She wished she could of exchange places with Phoebe when he was doing that to her. She wished she had been there to kick his ass so bad; to send him to hell 100 times and more. He deserved to be punished, to suffer like Phoebe was now.  
  
After a couple of seconds that no one said anything Phoebe fell to the floor sobbing.' I knew it, they're so disappointed of me' she thought in anguish. She tried to content herself but she couldn't anymore. All the memories and the pain came back to her. She fell to the floor wishing her life was over right then, wishing she had never told them.  
  
Prue seeing her sister's knees give up, immediately ran to her with tears streaming down her face finally.  
  
"Phoebe.I'm so, so sorry!" Prue cried holding Phoebe on her lap. " I wish you would of told us sooner" she said.  
  
Piper finally reacted and joined her sisters on the floor crying. All three of them cried with Phoebe.  
  
"I know, it just hurt so damn much I.I thought I couldn't take it" said Phoebe crying like she first had.  
  
"Ohw Phoebe! I wish there was something we could do." said Piper trying to think in something else to say to her.  
  
"There's nothing to do, he ruined my life and there's nothing anyone can do about it" Phoebe cried.  
  
"Phoebe listen to me, you're gonna get your life back I promise you, ok? I promise" Prue said kissing her sister's head.  
  
Phoebe wanted to believe Prue but she couldn't, she knew things weren't going to be the same anymore, and she felt like things were only gonna get worse. 


	17. Facing the facts

Facing the facts  
  
Author's note:  
  
I'm soooooo sorry it took me so long to update, I have been so bussy. Anyway, hope you like this chapter, I wrote it like a month ago, but like I said, I just hadn't found the time to post it! PLEASE REVIEW MORE!  
  
The sisters spend the whole afternoon crying with Phoebe on the living room couch. After hours of exhausting tears, Phoebe finally fell asleep on their arms.  
  
Prue and Piper were as exhausted as her but they couldn't even manage to close their eyes without imagine Ikarias touching their baby sister; with his eyes full of satisfaction because of his cruelness, his evil smile, his sick thoughts...it made them wanna puke.  
  
He was gone now, that was for sure, but his presence would never leave the sister's minds and it didn't exactly spare their pain either.  
  
Prue and Piper carried Phoebe up to her room to get some rest. 'She looks so peacefully sleeping' Piper thought, so different from the tormented Phoebe they saw a couple of hours ago. She secretly wished Phoebe could feel like that again all of the time...peacefully.  
  
Both sisters kissed Phoebe's head before heading out of her room. They walked over to the living room again, were they had cried earlier, and decided it was time to have a little chat about the facts.  
  
They finally knew the truth about Phoebe's old behavior, it did made them feel a little relief but they knew it was gonna be a long road before things could be normal around the manor again.  
  
"I can't believe this is happening..." Piper muttered after minutes of thoughtful silence.  
  
"I know...of all the things I thought she would tell us this wasn't even in the list" Prue said upset.  
  
"What are we gonna do now?" asked Piper helpless. The image of Phoebe's painful face crossed her mind making her wanna cry.  
  
"I don't know I mean, we have never dealt with something like this before" Prue said as a matter of fact. "Why didn't I went to pick her up" muttered Prue to herself under her breath. She covered her face with her hands while the guilt washed over her. She remembered Phoebe had asked her to come and pick her up that day at the library, Prue had told her to take her car and that she was old enough to take care of herself. Prue had been feeling very upset that day because she had dream about Andy the night before and it was really pissing her off. Of course that made Prue think that she could have done something to prevent it.  
  
"Prue what are you talking about?" asked Piper confused. She had been wondering why Prue hadn't blamed herself yet, and now was the moment. Prue always did that since their mother died, she would always blame herself every time something happened to either one of her sisters.  
  
Prue told Piper about how Phoebe had asked her to pick her up and how she had told her that she could take care of herself. Prue was almost crying at this point.  
  
"Prue..." Piper said feeling sorry for her oldest sister. She got up from the couch and went over to Prue and wrapped her arms around her neck. "Prue even if you had picked her up he would of attacked her anyway, he had been washing us for a long time now he would have take her anytime she was alone" explained Piper while Prue cried harder and harder.  
  
"But I could have done something...help her..." Prue said between sniffs.  
  
"Hush that thought. Look, Pheebs needs us right now ok? Not just me, she needs both of us. She needs someone to talk to and cry to nut not a sister that keeps blaming herself. She really doesn't need anymore problems right now...none of us does so, stop it! It was not your fault ok? Nobody blames you" said Piper a little too snappy. She didn't meant to be so rough o her but she knew that whenever Prue got to stubborn she would only react at harsh tones of voices.  
  
"Ok" said Prue laughing a little at the end between her tears. Piper laughed along with her after her little speech.  
  
They sat there holding each other for a second seeking comfort in the arms of the other one.  
  
"You think she's gonna be ok?" asked Piper concerned.  
  
"I think so. It's gonna be a very hard time for her right now but we just have to stick together and we'll get through this" Prue reassured hopeful.  
  
With that Prue hugged Piper even tighter than before, both of the grieving for their little sister. Just in the middle of the hug the yells of fear of the youngest Halliwell filled the entire house... 


	18. And the nightmare begins

...AND THE NIGHTMARE BEGINS  
  
Author's note: I'm so, so, so, so, so, so... * 2 hours later of saying "so"* so sorry I haven't updated in months! I hope you guys understand how sorry I am, I just have been totally busy with school and, who am I kidding, I've been really lazy too. Well, I hope you enjoy reading this new chapter as much as I enjoyed writing it.  
  
And on with the story...  
  
Both sisters raced upstairs to see what the cause of Phoebe's yelling was.  
  
They entered the room ready to kick any demons ass but instead they found nothing else but phoebe stirring in her sleep. She was sweating and turning on her bed; a painful look on her face while she yelled like she never had before, trying to tell Ikarias to stop, but of course, he was no where to be seen; he was already dead but for Phoebe, he wasn't.  
  
"Stop it!!!!! No!!!! Please...!" Phoebe sobbed in her sleep.  
  
Prue, seeing her sister's anguish, couldn't help but to feel even guiltier, even after everything Piper had said to her. She was suffering like she never had and Prue could have prevented, unless she thought she could have, but she didn't. She had failed Phoebe and there was nothing she could do to help her ease her pain.  
  
"Phoebe! Wake up honey, come on, please wake up!" Piper screamed desperate; she was the first to reacts to Phoebe. Kneeling in front of Phoebe's side of the bed, she shook Phoebe by her shoulder trying to make her snap out of it and wake up to her sisters so they could help her.  
  
Phoebe sat up straight, almost knocking Piper on her side, with her eyes wide open. She could feel the perspiration on her forehead and the sweat on her, already shaking, body. Her heart was beating faster and faster every time and the tears tolled freely down her cheek.  
  
Prue finally snapped out of her shock state of mind, after seeing Phoebe's condition, and ran to Hugh Phoebe and let her know that everything was alright and that she wasn't alone...she never would be.  
  
"Let me go!!! Please...Let me go!!! Stay away from me!!! You're hurting me!!!...please!!!" Phoebe screamed louder and louder every time while kicking and pushing both sisters away from her, thinking it was Ikarias who had her in his arms. She sat in the bed sobbing and shaking in fear; holding her knees close to her body with her arms while she rocked herself back and forth.  
  
Prue jumped in horror at Phoebe's reaction. 'Who is this scared little girl with the lost look on her face, crying without end? That's not Phoebe...it can't be' Prue thought to herself while Piper helped her up on her feet after Phoebe pushed her to the ground in fear. They had never seen her so neurotic and hysterical and scared, crying harder than she never had in her life.  
  
"Phoebe!" Piper called trying to get her sister's attention, but Phoebe's screams were louder than hers and she couldn't hear them....she didn't want to. She didn't want to hear 'his' voice, since she still thought it was him standing next to her.  
  
"Phoebe! Please listen to me! Is us...your sisters!" Piper yelled with tears filling her eyes. She hated seeing Phoebe in so much pain. Phoebe finally looked up to her and stopped shaking a little. She looked around noticing she was not in the smelly, dark old building Ikarias kept her, she was at the manor with her sisters in her room.  
  
"It's just us honey. You're ok, you're with us" said Piper softly trying to hold her tears, in order to be strong for Phoebe.  
  
"P, P, Pi...Per?" Phoebe managed to say between sniffs as she looked up to Piper with her red puffy eyes.  
  
"Yes sweetie, it's me" Piper said kneeling next to Phoebe so she could recognize her.  
  
"And Pr, Pr, Prue?" Phoebe asked again. She looked at Prue and immediately noticed how scared and guilty she was feeling. Prue was often betrayed by her face when she didn't want to say how she was feeling or was trying to hide something, but Phoebe could always figure it out. She also noticed Prue's red eyes, meaning she had been crying earlier on. 'Way to go Phoebe! You hurt them so much that even Prue cried because of your fault!' she thought in anger; kicking herself mentally. "Oh god..." Phoebe whispered before throwing herself on the bed, sobbing again.  
  
Prue and Piper got on the bed with Phoebe and hugged her tightly, trying as hard as they could to ease her pain, just a little. Prue and Piper were almost crying to at this point; seeing their baby sister like this hut them almost as much as Phoebe was.  
  
"It was horrible..." Phoebe said still crying hard, even thought she didn't think she had any more tears left.  
  
"I know honey...I know..." Piper whispered in her ear.  
  
"I kept telling him to stop..." Phoebe said in anguish of her memories. She didn't want to talk about it but she couldn't help herself, she needed to tell someone at some point, and this was definitely her breaking point.  
  
"Shhh...it's ok. You're safe now ok, it's over, you're stuck with us now and I promise you we're not gonna let anything happen to you ever again ok? Just relax, please" Prue said softly trying hard to keep the tears in her eyes from falling. She stroked Phoebe hair while she cried on her lap. Phoebe was so angry at Ikarias, but mostly at herself for letting him do that to her. Prue sensed her sister's pain and kissed her lovingly on the forehead in assurance. Prue promised herself rights then that she would not let any of her sisters go through anything like this again. 


End file.
